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Betty Heath: Valentines Are Sometimes Funny

February 9, 2019
Betty Heath From My Deck

The Mr. and I have shared quite a few Valentine’s Days together and we still look forward to what each has in store for us. We try to outdo each other. Sometimes the results are amusing or amazing, but mostly funny.

Yes, I still send Valentines to my friends and family. I’m just a kid at heart. I have found that Valentines come in all shapes and sizes and many are made from things other than paper.

For instance, the best Valentines are chocolate. Not just any chocolate, but at least 75 percent cacao chocolate. You know what I mean, the decadent, dark chocolate. In fact, studies have shown that chocolate with at least 75 percent (or higher) of cacao is very beneficial to your health. It lowers your blood pressure and your LDL (bad) cholesterol.

The fats contained in dark chocolate are 1/3 oleic acid which is a healthy monounsaturated fat also found in olive oil; 13 stearic acid which has been shown to have a neutral effect on cholesterol; and 1/3 palmitic acid which is a saturated fat that raises cholesterol. The way I see it, that means only 1/3 of the fat in dark chocolate is bad for you. But wait! I read another study that indicates avocados are one of the best anti-aging foods anyone can eat. So, eat dark chocolate to stay happy and healthy and eat avocados to stay young. That sounds likes a sensible plan to me.

Now what good is a chocolate valentine without a hug? Hugs are all important to me. I find myself greeting people by giving them a hug and then I hang on and hug them again when we part. It’s just my nature. Of course, some people are harder to hug than others. This is mainly because of the girth of either the hugger or the huggie. When you can’t reach around someone’s girth, that’s when you go for the neck. Hug their neck but try not to choke them to death.

I know Thursday is Valentine’s Day, but today I’m sending a few early Valentine Hugs via my column.

• The first one I am sending goes to the wonderful students and staff at Grand View Elementary School in Frederick. I have the privilege of working with some of the best students and teachers in the whole world. Here’s a big hug for allowing me to be your Grandma Betty. You guys rock my world. I love each one and enjoy our times together.

•Second one goes to my readers. Without you I would be nothing. I absolutely enjoy interacting with all of you who take the time to email me and stop me as I journey around the area. Thank you, thank you for all your support and feedback. I love you for keeping me motivated.

• Third one goes to my editors. Notice that is plural as is more than one. I never know which one I’m going to be in trouble with, next. Thank you for keeping me on track. I love you for hanging with me.

• Saving the best until last. Thank you to The Mr. who makes my life so special. You promised me that you would make me the queen of your life if I would marry you. Elizabeth may be the Queen of England, but for the past 30-on years, I have been Elizabeth, Queen of Everything because of your love.

I hope each one reading this gets a large chunk of dark, decadent chocolate and an even larger hug from the ones you love. I might try making a healthy Valentine this year by dipping an anti-aging avocado in some healthy, dark, decadent chocolate.

Now, that just might be a funny valentine!

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