Bishops' Document Urges Men, Women to Share Feelings, Household Duties With AM-Husbands and Wives, Bjt

Undated (AP) _ Excerpts from ''Follow the Way of Love: A Pastoral Message of the U.S. Catholic Bishops to Families'':

''An enduring marriage is more than simply endurance. It is a process of growth into an ultimate friendship and a deepening peace. So we urge all couples: Renew your commitment regularly, seek enrichment often, and ask for pastoral and professional help when needed.''

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''Marriage must never become a struggle for control. For, unlike other relationships, marriage is a vowed covenant with unique dimensions. In this partnership, mutual submission - not dominance by either partner - is the key to genuine joy.''

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''Mutuality is really about sharing power and exercising responsibility for a purpose larger than ourselves. How household duties are distributed should follow from understanding what it takes to build a life together, as well as the individual skills and interests you bring in your common life.''

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''Sharing feelings and a willingness to be vulnerable can be difficult, particularly for those of us raised in the 'strong and silent' tradition. Men in all walks of life seem to have been influenced by this unwritten norm.''

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''When children are born, both mother and father are important in nurturing and forming them. More and more, fathers have been discovering how their involvement in parenting enriches both their children and themselves. This is a hopeful development.''

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''Women who accept their own self-worth are more able to express their beliefs, ideas and feelings, even painful ones such as anger.''

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''So each of us needs to ask: to what am I giving my precious time? What are my priorities? Do television, sports, making money, shopping, getting ahead on the job, volunteering in the church or community swallow up time that could be better spent with those I love?''