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AM-Prep: Kickers

January 31, 2019

WOULD-BE BANK ROBBER ABANDONS PLAN

FALL RIVER, Mass. (AP) — It takes a lot of nerve — or desperation — to pull off a bank heist. And apparently a woman in Massachusetts decided she didn’t have enough of either to rob a bank in Fall River the other day. Police are looking for the woman who set out to get cold, hard cash from the Fall River Municipal Credit Union on Monday — but walked out with a case of cold feet, instead. Police tell the Herald News the woman walked in, approached a teller — then hesitated. She told the teller “give me a minute,” walked to a counter and scrawled on a piece of paper. Moments later, she ripped up the note, dropped the pieces in the trash and left. Bank workers pieced the note together and it said: “Give me the money.” Police have released surveillance images of the woman — and would like to chat with her.

MR. HOT DOG ANNOUNCES SCHOOL CLOSINGS IN S.D.

PARKER, S.D. (AP) — Forget a cold, impersonal phone tree call, text message or email. In Parker, South Dakota, school officials are using a talking hot dog to announce closings because of the extreme cold that has been socking the area. In a video posted to the Parker School District’s Facebook page, Mr. Hot Dog” laments the freezing temperatures, saying “I’m a hot dog! I need some heat! ... You cannot have school! It’s too cold outside.” Mr. Hot Dog told students about yesterday’s weather-related closing, urging students to watch Netflix or bake a cake — but to stay away from the addictive videogame “Fortnite.” The school superintendent says he created the video, complete with a moving mouth, bun and mustard, using Snapchat.

NEW MEXICO SCHOOL DELAYED BY OIL

EUNICE, N.M. (AP) — Talking about a slippery slope — not to mention slippery corridors and staircases. A Eunice, New Mexico, high school had to delay classes Monday after vandals sneaked onto campus and poured vegetable oil all over the place. Once the oil was discovered Sunday night, custodial staff had to scoot in early Monday to clean up the mess. Principal Tracy Davis says surveillance cameras captured six people wearing black clothes, hoodies and gloves pouring oil on floors. Davis says the “greasers” got in through an unlocked classroom window. No arrests have been made.

by Oscar Wells Gabriel II

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